07 August 2013

Inspiration Needed (Dear Anonymous)

An anonymous reader left the following message on a recent blog post:
She wrote the following:

"Hi! My name is Morag. I am a fifteen year old girl trying to recover from anorexia.I just discovered your blog.I am scared of dying. I am scared of ruining my relationships. But I'm scared of eating more. I keep saying "this is it, this is the breaking point where I get better" only to go back to panicking about calories the next day. If you have any inspiration for me, please PLEASE share. Thanks..."

I left her the following message after her comment:

Dear Anonymous,

I'm afraid everything I say will sound trite: you're young, you have your whole life ahead of you, you can defeat this because you most likely have not had anorexia for a long time (meaning it has not become chronic, as it is in my case since I'm entering my six year of treatment.)

All of these things might be true, but I'm betting that the eating disorder voice can trash each one and turn it around to make you feel hopeless.

Do you have a therapist? A dietitian? A eating disorders psychiatrist? It's hard to know what to say when I have so little to go on, and also do not know your living situation, i.e. does it contribute to your eating disorder or is your family supportive? Have you looked into ED recovery groups? I know that these groups are limited and it depends upon where you live.

Just know that you can recover, many people do. It takes hard work and understanding that it won't happen overnight. Realize you will sometimes slide back; this happens in recovery.
Finally, you have to WANT to recover. I know that might sound strange and not very helpful, but it's the truth. You have to want to recover, and you have to be willing to give up the anorexia identity and discover who you are and the things you can do.

Please feel free to e-mail me at angelaelackey@gmail.com if you have any questions, etc. I might be off the grid for about a week or so, so don't worry if I don't answer right away; I will answer.

I will keep you in my prayers.

However, I was hoping perhaps some of you might have inspiration, too? If so, please share in the comments.Maybe we can stop one more young person from being sucked into anorexia for life. Maybe we might save her a lot of pain and heartache. I hope so.

Thank you.


Ashley Noelle said...

It is not easy thing to try convince someone to get help for their ED. The fact that she has reached out to you speaks volume in itself. You said everything I'd have. Get a therapist. That is the key. Then go from there. Start small, and take a step forward to recovery.

Meliss said...

i think that one of the most important things is being willing to get better. and being willing to do whatever that takes, including eating. and be willing to take a good, hard look at ourselves and what's underlying our eating disorder. and being willing to give up this disorder, which i believe has protected me from all sorts of pain

in AA, they say willingness is the foundation of reoovery. if i'm not willing to do what it takes........

but it's not easy! i suppose no one said it was going to be easy. but it IS worth it, i find.

Fireflyby said...

Advice... I have lots but to dish it out to someone who can't even see me would make it impossible to begin to take in... Besides, I'm in a similar position myself and it feels so hypocritical.
This illness is cruel and its claws dig deep. One moment you have that 'breakthrough moment' of determination and fresh resolve, yet when you are actually faced with the food, it disappears like a handful of sand.
Just as Ashley has already said, small steps are the way ahead... and an acceptance that recovery takes time... and involves a renewing of the mind, as well as the body.
So hope that Morag can begin to reach out to others for help.
This is a great blog. I've only just discovered you!
Hope it's okay for me to leave this comment...

Ashli said...

Reaching out for help is often the first step in recovery. I know that it was for me. I battled an eating disorder when I was in high school, and I will always remember the first time I sought help and counsel from someone else - it was a significant turning point for me that lead to my healing.

At the same time, people told me over and over again to "do this" and "do that" to get better - eat larger portions, snack more, keep a dietary log, write in a journal, control your thoughts, etc... The advice seemed good, but I felt powerless to do it on my own, and honestly, I was. That's why my best encouragement for people who may be reading is this: Don't depend on your own power to fight this battle. You will wear yourself out trying to do it alone. Seek the counsel of others - friends, family, and professionals. Most of all, seek the guidance and strength of the Lord. Without Him, I would still be stuck in the rut of my eating disorder. Because of Him, I am free and healed, and I celebrate His grace and love to rescue and restore me. I know He will do the same for you when you trust Him and seek Him!

-Ashli Roussel, author of Boundless: Discovering God In Your Eating Disorder.